![]() ![]() You can find more reader dilemmas for Richard Madeley here or submit your own below. You’re in danger of drifting into a minefield. If I may address him directly: have a care, my friend. I’m not advocating you completely ‘ghost’ this woman but I am strongly advising you to slow it down to a near halt. ![]() Meanwhile he simply shouldn’t be available to collect her car, give her lifts, run errands, let alone drop in for breakfast.įrom now on make sure that you are present for all meetings with her, and gradually reduce these in number too. Cut that to seven, and then five, and then three. For example, let’s say your husband currently replies to 10 text messages from her every week. My advice is not to cut her off dead, but put together a carefully planned programme of gentle, steady withdrawal. (He seems to be playing pretty straight with you on this, so I won’t consider the possibility that he might not reject her.) If she does end up making a move on him and he rejects her, things could really get complicated and fraught. The magazine issue was usually for a good cause, including charity and campaigns that promoted body positivity. Your needy neighbour is quite clearly working to exclude you from the equation. In 2013, Pearl Thusi posed nude for the Marie Claire South Africa Naked Issue. You’ve acted with generosity but based on the trajectory of the relationship as you describe it, it’s pretty obvious to me that it’s steaming steadily into deep waters. You both need to put your marriage first and carefully back away from this woman. I don’t want to cause an issue, but why has my husband been adopted as a best friend, leaving me feeling excluded? Of course it has crossed my mind that she is ‘setting her cap’ at my husband, and this doesn’t seem that strange to me as I am quite fond of him myself, but I think I trust him to hold his animal instincts in check (not least because we’re both aware that this woman is still fairly vulnerable). No texts or calls are made when he is around. She has a steady boyfriend who is my husband’s age – a good 20 years older than her. This did actually make him uncomfortable and we discussed it after she left. She has now progressed to lots of phone calls and requests for favours (could he come to college to support issues with her younger sister, etc) and yesterday she came round for coffee with us and invited us for breakfast with her and her sister this morning, which in practice meant him as I’ll be working. ![]() He is the most loving and trustworthy person and the messages were only friendly banter he ignored some and replied noncommittally to others. However, some time after that she started texting my husband a lot, just little jokes and observations (they work in the same industry). She has had a rough time and we did our best to give her some support. My husband and I struck up a friendship with our young neighbour around three years ago. ![]()
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